20 ways to maintain a healthy level of insanity

April 17th, 2007

Originally published at [ every moment ]. You can comment here or there.

i got this from a co-worker. i have seen it before.. you may have too.. but it’s funny enough to read again -)

20 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity

1. at lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. see If they slow down.

2. page yourself over the intercom. don’t disguise your voice.

3. every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4. put your garbage can on your desk and label it “In.”

5. put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

6. in the memo field of all your checks, write “For smuggling diamonds.”

7. finish all your sentences with “In accordance with the prophecy.”

8. don t use any punctuation

9. as often as possible, skip rather than walk.

10. order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11. specify that your drive-through order is “To Go.”

12. sing along at the opera

13. go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don’t rhyme

14. put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.

15. five days in advance, tell your friends you can’t attend their party because you’re not in the mood.

16. have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, “Rock Bottom”.

17. when the money comes out of the ATM, scream “I Won!, I Won!”

18. when leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling “Run for your lives, they’re loose!!”

19. tell your children over dinner. “Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go.”

20. and … the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity: pass this on. make someone smile -)

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5 Responses to “20 ways to maintain a healthy level of insanity”

  1. irishhh says:

    haha. that’s funny, tray. thanks! :]

  2. cattyeyz says:

    I’m going to do ALL of these. Especially #17 when someone else is in the car with me. Hilarious.

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